The German engineer Julius Kroehl built the submarine in 1864. Its purpose? To secretly deliver undocumented primate species from cargo ships (returning from Africa) to underground research facilities located in Washington. Under the authorization of Ulysses S. Grant, the animals were trained for use as front-line infantry in the Union Army. The transport of the ape super soldiers was made possible by the fully submersible craft known simply as “The Gray Gator”. Thirty-five feet long by ten feet wide, it could successfully dive to a depth of 15.5 feet.

History tells us that the Gator’s last known voyage occurred in 1870 when it plunged to a silly 16 feet. Although the captain and seven monkey recruits were lost at sea that fateful day, it would mark the beginning of what is now known as Guerrilla Warfare.

So how did the remains of this ancient maritime wonder end up in Pasadena last Tuesday morning? “We have no idea,” Ted Davies responded after finding the sub lounging on the custom sandy entrance beach of his newly installed backyard.

“I’ve never heard of this Gray Gator, but maybe you can help us explain its historical significance to the Terrace Heights Homeowners Association at this Friday’s community hearing,” said Carol, Davies’ wife. “They want to fine us $ 350.00 unless we can paint it an approved color and get our neighbors to approve it.”

As with all mysteries, theories about its sudden appearance are beginning to circulate. Some speculate that the pool was once connected to the ocean in Earth’s remote past. Others believe it was part of a military time travel experiment gone wrong. Others suggest it could be the work of Davies’ “good-for-nothing” son-in-law, who placed him there as revenge for not funding his expedition to find the Gray Gator’s remains.